Archive for November 8th, 2011

Shit happens?!?

Tuesday, November 8th, 2011

…same shit, different believe… 😉

TAOISM: Shit happens.
CATHOLICISM: If shit happens, you deserved it.
PROTESTANTISM: Shit doesn’t happen if you work hard enough.
BUDDHISM: If shit happens, it isn’t really shit.
HINDUISM: This shit has happened before.
ISLAM: Shit happens if it is the will of Allah.
JUDAISM: Why does this shit always happen to me?
CONFUCIANISM: Confucious said: “Shit happens.”
ZEN: What is the sound of one full shit happening?
AGNOSTICISM: What the fock is this shit?
ATHEISM: I don’t believe this shit!
BAHA’I: It’s all the same shit. Isn’t it?
RASTAFARIANISM: Let’s smoke this shit.
COMMUNISM. Shit happens to all people equally.
CAPITALISM: Anybody can get the whole shit.
CHRISTIAN SCIENCE: When shit happens, don’t call a doctor – pray.
EXISTENTIALISM: Shit doesn’t happen; shit is, you know (yes you know).
DIANETICS: Your mother gave you shit before your were born.
EST: If my shit bothers you, that’s your shit. No shit!
JEHOVAH’S WITNESSES: Wait till the real shit happens in Armaggedon.
MOONIES: Only happy shit really happens.
NEW AGE: Visualize all this shit is in fact a kind of NOT happening you know..
NIHILISM: Who needs this shit?
QUAKERISM: Let’s not fight over this shit.
SEVENTH DAY ADVENTIST: No shit on Saturdays.
SHINTOISM: Shit is everywhere.
STOICISM: This shit is good for me.
PESSIMISM: The filthy shit you just stepped into is just the beginning.
OPTIMISM: One day all this shit will be over.
HOOLIGANISM: Just hit all the SHIT out of all those shitty shitheads!
THEOSOPHY: You don’t know half of the shit that happens.